Bring on the Night

Preparing for bed I did the usual routine. As I strolled towards the bed to settle in, I heard C screaming: “NO! – you don’t sleep in that side of the bed anymore!”.

Huh? – Had someone finally seen through my charade and recognized me as easily replaced? Should I grab my stuff and head for a long lonely night in the rain?

“You are too heavy – you killed that side the bed” a commanding female voice said and interrupted my escape plans. At least she didn’t say “fat” for once.

Well, okay, I have to admit that my side of the bed had a tiny nifty shape of my well-shaped Brad Pitt-like body. But it wasn’t “killed”, just used. That could be the work of anyone who’d been single for a long time (but somehow still optimistic enough to buy a double bed).

The voice of logic talked to me inside my head: “It doesn’t really help the situation much that you always sleep on the same side as me after 5 minutes every night dear”. “The left side of the bed is not worn, it’s just USED contrary to the right side, where YOU should be sleeping”. Wisely I didn’t say it out loud.

I crawled into my new bed side with a “yes dear” smile on my face.

Tags: Humour, man vs woman